Note to a stranger

Note 1

Dear stranger in teal trousers, it was nice of you to pay for my meal the other day. Such generosity is rare these days. I loved the way you rocked the teal trousers. I could borrow some tips from you. However, kindly keep it down when you are on the phone. We really don’t care how much millions you are willing or not willing to pay for a service. Also it is pretty rude to snatch another’s cash in the name of trying to catch one’s attention. Try “hello” and take it up from there next time. Thirdly, thou shalt not stare. That said, hoping to run into you sometimes soon.

Note 2

Dear tall guy, I was wondering if we had met before when you greeted me as I walked out of the supermarket last week. Strange yeah as I don’t recall ever meeting you. But I smiled and replied. And I was hoping and seriously praying it would stop there. That you won’t behave the way I imagined you would. Alas, I was wrong. Weren’t you taught not to talk to strangers? Did you expect me to wait and talk to you in a near empty car-park?

Note 3

Aunty (as we have to call you), it was nice meeting a new aunty after 2x years. Seems till I die I would always meet some relation or the other. However you still remain a stranger as I cannot even recall your name or face or the connection. Don’t you think though it is improper to talk “bad” about someone on his wedding day? You decided to give me the history of a cousin (I knew not until that day). How much of a bad child he is and how but for my father you wouldn’t have come for the wedding. I would rather you didn’t because you have succeeded in distorting my opinion. For all I know, he might not even be what you said he is but I can’t see him now and view him favourably. On his wedding day for that matter. Kindly keep your opinions to yourself and let me form mine about people.

In other news, am I the only one who thinks people are just getting worked up over this Margaret Thatcher’s issue. Can we just respect the dead and move on? All these “Ding Dong the Witch is dead” and the likes are they necessary? No matter how bad a person was, they got relations who are mourning, can we just let them grieve?

In other other news, a friend said during the week that guys are monitoring spirits. Na only guys dey stalk?

And Happy Belated Birthday to Angelsbeauty… Many more blogging years.

Happy Sunday people and have a blessed week.

27 dresses

I promise. I won’t turn this blog into a wedding blog. Just trying to “document” my wedding planning experience as well as ask for your opinions especially those who recently planned weddings in Nigeria.

As some of you know, I have 2 bridesmaid duty in August and I am as excited as I am scared. I am helping both of them plan. My head is spinning already. Whew. Drew up a budget template in one night (I know right, templates plenty online; just didn’t find one that covered the full Nigerian wedding). Anywayz, that has been sorted. Now bridesmaids dresses, bride’s gown, colours, make-up and all. There is so much to do in so little time. I think I am going to stick to planning mine for a year. That way I get to take my time planning right? And not rushing/having so much to do in a short time. Working on the pre-wedding photoshoot at the moment. Which brings me to my first issue/challenge. I am all of pre-wedding photoshoot, I am just against releasing the pictures before the wedding. You ask so why the photoshoot ba? I dunno o. I just don’t wanna see my picture on any party favour or souvenir. Is that wrong? I am so gonna guard my pictures and his jealously. Except you find individual pictures sha o and photoshop, you aint gonna find a picture of both of us. Till after the wedding.

Issue number 2. How do I tell my mum I got bridesmaid duties. She don already talk say make me and my elder sister no do bridesmaid again. Issue number 3. Cost of dresses. I have spent my last 2 free Saturdays (I do one Saturday on, one Saturday off work) at one wedding or the other. Fortunately no aso-ebis so far. However, my next 3 weddings involve aso-ebi or bridesmaid dresses. The cost is killing yo! Issue 4. Getting the brides to sit down and let us work on these budgets. They seem to think we still have time. Enough issues for one post.

I saw a picture of a bride and her bridesmaids wearing similar gowns (same ivory colour, lacy design and all) on instagram. What happened to nobody wearing white/ivory asides the bride? You are allowed to wear any other colour or mix white/ivory with something else. Be rest assured, you wear white/ivory for my wedding? Don’t worry, the bouncers and MOPOL know what to do. Lol.

I learnt some “new skill” over the weekend. Had 2 weddings (one on both sides of the family) and since I was mum’s driver, I had to attend both. So mums and I did her side’s first. Went to the church and ensured we saw her half brother, step mum and other family members and took of to join pops at his cousin’s own. Church service at that already started so we had to wait till after the service and ensured we were seen. Skill is if you have more than one wedding, get to the church service early and ensure you are SEEN by those who need to know you came. Take off after the service and head to the reception of the other. Ensure also that they SEE you. I grew up believing the solution was to split. Mums goes for one, pops goes for one. But if the weddings are in the same state/area, just show face and ensure the important people see you o.

Later went to pick a friend at another wedding and heard how some friend of the groom proposed to his girlfriend (with the help of the compere). If you try that at mine ehn?

Now to my polls.

*sigh oh sigh* Who else thinks what I am thinking about Scandal? Jake-Olivia-Fitz angle. Your thoughts please.

I should be watching the Manchester Derby right? Alrighty, am out. Maybe I can catch the last few minutes.

Tada

Weddings, wickedness and other things

Ok, this post has no head or tail, so ya all should bear with me. And my editors (you know yourselves), feel free to buzz ehn..

Tis wedding season. Yayyest…. I dunno what people mean by wedding season but I am assuming it is the period between March and December as there aint that much weddings in January and February (I think I prefer to wed either in January, April, September or December though; why, I dunno). So the wedding I have been raving about is a week away and am freaking excited. I dunno o. No bi me ku dey wed. I guess maybe because she is the first amongst my friends from Uni getting married. At least we finally have someone to bell the cat.. I dey wait all my childhood friends. Taking their sweet time yeah? I guess the fact that I get to see people I haven’t seen in almost 5 years also adds to the excitement. I know tis gonna be a very busy and stressful day. Engagement, church and reception all on the same day. I hate being stressed yet I am so looking forward to it. Plus I get to launch my fascinator… Waiting patiently for tomorrow (when I get to pick up my fascinator or facilitator as a dear friend called it; I am sowie, I just had to put that up)… Would put up pictures sha…

And like everybody was waiting for L to lead, got a wedding 2 weeks after that (my cousin), another in May and then a break till August… I mustu buy aso-ebi utunu (not like I like them or would do aso-ebi for mine). I am just all so excited yo!!! The sad part though is the when would you marry?, what happened? questions. *sigh*. I was at L’s bridal shower yesterday (twas very lovely, thanks for asking; lol). The highlight? The screaming. Wow, we have all grown. Low point. The what happened questions. Fortunately, nobody asked me anything till it was over. Tried not to feel too sad sha considering what date it was. Well till I got back home and laid on my bed. *sigh*. Moving on.

Why do we delight in being mean to others? To make life hard especially for the less privileged? We have this lovely lady who cleans the office. Mid-March, she is yet to be paid for February. Meanwhile, the company has been paid since 26th February. We later find out that the money was given to her supervisor and she “decided” to keep it with her. Why? Why?? Why??? To think this lady earns less than 20k. Wickedness. Be nice people. BE NICE.

In other news, I made ugwu today. It has been over 5 months I cooked. I miss living alone yo!!!! I miss having someone to cook for. I hope to continue sha… BBC recipes has become my favourite site now. Wish I found egusi and panla to use. Well, next time. By the way, this is strike 2. You know yourself. Food war. Game on!!!!!

Waiting patiently for my hair ish. You know yourself o. Come and enjoy this heat with us. Am I the only one who finds myself drinking as much as 4 bottles of water in a day? For someone who usually never finished even 1 bottle? This weather is killing me. I gas return to my town. Manchester. I am Mancunian you know? *tongue out*. Heat wave wey no get part 2.

Oh and I have finally passed the “I can’t leave my hair undone for more than a week stage”. I never *tears* thought I would *tears* survive *tears* but here I am, *tears* 3 weeks after *tears* and the saloon no longer appeals to me *big smile* … I hope my weaves won’t waste sha. Should make my wigs this weekend. I pray baby sis doesn’t see this. She thinks I am falling her hand and that I am not “positioning” myself. What does she know?

We live in a very small world. The rate at which I meet someone who knows someone I know these days is getting out of hand biko. I fear I might have been rude to one of my boo’s relatives in the past and it would haunt me. Biko, I apologize to those I have been nasty to in the past o. Took only a picture of L and her boo for me to find out a few other friends knew our in-law.

Like I said, this post no get head or tail. Still have a lot more I wanna post about but I should end here. When would all these bombings stop though?

Oya, over to my editors….

Quick one, Adele or Emeli Sande? Who do you prefer?

I begged God to die

I got your attention with that title right? Lols. Nothing serious. Just remembered the story of Jonah earlier today and how he asked God to kill him.

Now,  Lord , take away my life, for it is better for me to die than to live. (Jonah 4:3)

I was at that point in life late last year. I literally begged God to take my life. Moved from begging when He didn’t to praying for rapture to come like yesterday. *le sigh*. I am alright people. It was just a phase.

Remembered that today and how often we get judgmental or because we don’t know how someone feels about something bad that happened, how easily we make comments that could hurt the person (not like we intended to). I am one of those who anytime Jonah’s story came up or I read it, I scoffed and raised my nose. I asked if he was God and why he should be angry God didn’t destroy a city. I wondered and said he should have killed himself na. Abi? If God no kee you, kee yourself.

I recently stumbled on some posts on suicides, depression and all and remembered my reaction to a couple of suicides last year (relationship related suicides). Forgive me, I asked what they were thinking. Couldn’t they have considered the family they left behind? Why kill yourself because of a man/woman? And all and all. This morning I was reminded I was no different. No difference between me who asked God to kill me and the one who decided to do the killing herself/himself. And as I thought about all that all I could sing was

Imela, Imela, Okaka, Onyekeruwa
Imela, Imela, Ezemo.

I remembered how easy it is/was to judge others. A friend had her wedding cancelled recently (groom to be called it off a month to the wedding) and another friend actually said “I hope she moves on fast” and all sorts and I just sat there thinking “na so e easy?” Just pray and thank God you aint in her shoes. For once I understood how she felt, because I have been in her shoes. I have had a lot of people to tell me things in the last 3 months and am just there thinking “it is so easy for you to talk”. Then I also thought, what if these people who killed themselves had similar conversations and had people tell them the usual.  And they just couldn’t get past that phase? There are days people tell me things and I just cut them off or tell them point blank, don’t tell me that, you don’t know how I feel. So easy for you to say. Now I know what it is like. I hope never to “judge” people that way any longer. Offer your support and gauge the person’s mood before you start talking. Same thing with when someone loses a loved one. I usually don’t call or say anything. I just go see the person and hug or just sit with the person. Not because I can’t say the usual, it is well and all but cause I won’t. At least not when it is still fresh. A lot of people are struggling. In the spirit of the season (no be love season we dey?), show some love.

Moving on to interesting and happy things. It is Valentine’s day right. Happy for all of una. Never been a freak (see reasons here). However, I am happy a lot of people are happy. Good thing about having all sisters is somehow, something always enters the house. I see cake in the house already. Should I say my boss “val-ed” me? She gave me shoes this morning. Did I write it on my forehead that I am a shoe lover? First gave me a whole gift bag of jewellery over the weekend. Now shoes? What should I expect next? Na female no worry.

So I hear there is mahd traffic on the Island. Am I surprised? No. Na usual Vals day traffic. One of the reasons I hate detest Vals day. Thank God I aint on the Island this year. Plus must it rain every Vals day? I don’t know about last year but in the last few years, it has rained every Vals day. *smh*

From helping a friend get Vals gifts to planning a bridal shower, I have had an extra busy week. Work in itself is usually hectic. I now added more work to it. It was fun sha. Btw, where can I get red fascinator in Lagos? Already planning my outfit for L’s wedding (which is a month away). I am that kind of an organiser. I tend to plan a lot of things way in advance. No aso -ebi (girl after my heart) but touch of red. Now I am planning nude gown, shoes and bag. I NEED A RED FASCINATOR. Don’t make me wear a red gown please. Red is strictly for accessories- nail polish, lip stick (oh la la) and all those tinz.

I am beginning to plan a wedding in my head (plus my speech). Introduced two friends recently and the guy buzzes me to tell me they are doing dinner tonight and was seriously praying she doesn’t relocate (her family is out of the country). I was just awwwing. I am just that much of a sucker for love. I am gonna restrain myself from buzzing the babe later tonight to ask how it went. Abi should I buzz? Yes/No… The urge to buzz is strong yo. I am seriously praying it goes well BECAUSE I am writing my “how they met” story already. Yes ke, na me introduce them.

In other news, I met SNM on Sunday. Naughty child he is. Offered me only water. iKid. Offered me drinks and food, I opted for water. Twas nice seeing you. Second blogger I get to meet. Where are the others o?

Happy Valentine’s day dear readers. Hope ya all had fun or are having fun today. If you val-ed someone or got val-ed, please remember some of us get sweet tooth. Send our cake, chocolate and all o. For #teamforeveralones, well sowie. Next year ehn.

Oh and my boss brings cake….. This woman knows how to put a smile on my face….

Happy belated birthday to Just Joxy. I am so sorry I missed the date. And happy birthday to my god-mum and my cousin IfeOluwa.
Tada