It is harder to lead a family than rule a nation– Chinese Proverb
I remembered SingleNigerianMan when I saw that; his ever present Chinese proverbs tweets. Anyways back to the post.
The first chapter began with Steve telling what led to the writing of the book. Seriously, men’s ministry needs help world over. Women ministry in churches kick off and everybody gets involved but when it comes to men? You practically have to beg to get them to come together.
Here, he raised three things which he wants to say to men.
1. War has been declared on the biblical family. And with each passing day, the devil is gaining grounds. Relationships, marriages have been destroyed. He paints a picture of an eighteen year old young man full of life, has a girl friend, has all the good things life has to offer and is suddenly sent to Vietnam. At Vietnam, on this particular day the patrol leader appoints him to be the point man. Wahala right? Your every action or inaction, alertness, judgement determines whether your team gets back to base alive. While on patrol the enemy opens fire. Your patrol leader is dead. As the point man, you are left to lead the group. Your leadership will make the difference. Now imagine your team instead of having just men (soldiers like yourself), you have your wife and three kids. You are not leading a group of men. You are leading your family. He painted a very gruesome picture (war isn’t it at all. Looking forward to when peace shall reign). But really there is a war against families and the casualty list is growing even bigger. When he wrote the book, some of the stats were: one out of two marriages end in divorce, in 1960, one out of every ten households was maintained by a woman with no husband present; in 1996, two out of five households was maintained by a woman with no husband present. Depressing right? Yet am sure it is even worse now. He then asked what men are doing to keep their marriages off the casualty list. All around, friends get married, and even in days now, they get divorced. What are we doing? It is no longer a case of it is those in “the world”. Even Pastors these days struggle to keep their marriages intact.
2. Satan has two specific goals in his war on the family. Two strategies:
Strategy #1: to effectively alienate and sever a husband’s relationship with his wife either emotionally or physically. Both equally effective. I remember my father once saying “you ruin a man’s family, you effectively ruin his life”.
Strategy #2: to effectively alienate and sever a father’s relationship with his children. Also emotionally or physically. Both also equally effective. He said “families are dying all over America”. I say “families are dying all over the world”. How many of us have that friend whose parents don’t live together? How many of us have those friends who are divorced or separated? They are everywhere. All around us. The enemy cannot kill a family without dividing the husband and wife. One such method he uses is sending men (and even women these days) in pursuit of money, fame, wealth, excellence, ambition whilst the family is dying.
3. Satan’s strategy in the war on the family is to neutralize the man. As a man, you have been appointed to be the head of the family. You as the point man would be under attack more than any member of your family. When the devil wants to neutralize the man, he targets the head. If he can neutralize the man, he has succeeded in neutralizing the family and by extension the church. How many Pastors have we heard about whose marriage break down led to the church splitting? Satan’s strategy is to neutralize the leaders. You become a leader? Be ready for battle. There would be shelling on all sides.
In the war on the family, the harvest is our children– Steve Farrar.